I was going to fast, I was going to exercise, however I see no point as of yet.
I am going on holiday in a few weeks - a holiday where I will want to eat. I'm not anorexic - just an extreme dieter at times - therefore I know I want to eat at that point. I want to enjoy that time. So if I starve myself, how bad will I feel when I put it all back on?!
I don't know what to do - I feel in control of nothing and I cried before. I've nothing to do if I haven't got a goal.
Today I had a slice of cheesecake, some prawns and chicken in rice, some coke, a bagel and a bottle of stella.
So as of now I'm nothing, no one. I'm fat and ugly and have no purpose.
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